Before I Met Keanu Reeves, I Also Ran Into Bigfoot

Many of you now know about my serendipitous run-in with Keanu Reeves. I still don’t understand quite how that happened, but I’m glad it did as it was awesome. What you don’t know is that I also ran into Bigfoot.

Jess Witkins Meets Keanu Reeves

I was planning to write a very different story for my blog that weekend. A story about a hiking trip that Joe and I went on.

IMG_6080

I know, I know, we all know how THAT goes. One of us ends up missing

And to that I say, at least we’re consistent, which is a prime foundation to have in a marriage, especially when one party may have pooped their pants while hiking thereby ruining all shreds of romance forever. 

So before Joe and I ended up at the bar where I glanced out the window and commented “That guy looks like Keanu,” we were hiking.

IMG_6058Sure, sure, this is exactly how it’s supposed to look. I always crawl through death branches to get from point A to point B. 

True to form, Joe rarely lets me pick what direction we go since I’m supposedly the one that got us lost the first time. But then, he went and picked a trail that looks like this!

IMG_6104

Me: “Well this looks like a dark and treacherous path.” 

Joe: “I’ve made my peace with it.” 

It doesn’t even phase him anymore!

When we crept upon the creepiest cavern looking structure, we debated.

Me: “Oh look at that. I bet that’s the witch’s cabin.” 

Joe: “That’s just a rock formation.” 

Me: “That’s what she wants you to think.” 

Amazingly, we were not witch-napped and forced to eat sweets until our bellies burst and no one made pies out of our intestines and such. But it was a close call, lemme tell you.

On a sunnier trail, we fell into one of our usual conversations comparing our relationship to various film or book references. You know, a “you’re Wild Bill Hickock and I’m Calamity Jane from Deadwood” or “you’re Lonestar from Spaceballs, but I’m Dot not Princess Vespa.”

And then Joe tried to sum us up with this…

Joe: “The difference between us is that I’m more crass, but you have the dirtier mind.” 

Me: *leans in really close to his ear and whispers* “You’re welcome.” 

And then this is the part where I’m guessing Joe got sun poisoning. Or temporarily possessed by aliens because I shot this photo….

IMG_6083Pretty funky lighting, amirite?

And then he did this…

Who knew, Bigfoot’s in Wisconsin?!

*****

How was your week everyone? 

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12 responses

  1. LOL I want to go hiking with you two!

    1. You’re welcome at your own risk!

  2. I kinda thought Bigfoot would be, I don’t know…..bigger. And just a bit hairier. Are you sure about this? 😉

    1. He’s pretty hairy, but you know this was still summer. He hasn’t grown his winter coat yet.

  3. Y’all have the coolest hiking trips.

    1. I know someone who would debate that. LOL

  4. Me: “Oh look at that. I bet that’s the witch’s cabin.”
    Joe: “That’s just a rock formation.”
    Lol. You’re such a writer. 🙂

    1. It WAS a witch cabin. I’m pretty sure anyway.

  5. How much wine was in that canteen of yours, anyway?!

    1. I don’t think we packed wine on this trip. That’s why we went for beer afterwards!

  6. And this is why your relationship works! I have no iota where you two were. But my goodness is that some beautiful wooded country. A great day for a hike even if it did involve Bigfoot. Boy, that beer had to taste good afterward. 🙂

    1. LOL. Wisconsin does bluffs and beer quite well!

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