Tag Archives: chiropractors

Sooo, You’re Saying I’m Deformed?

Yes.

That is exactly what my doctor told me.

*****

Last Thursday Evening:

I sat down at my laptop to get some work done, but I had a tension headache interfere with my productivity. So I took it upon myself to stretch my neck out.

😀

Those of you who’ve been hanging out here for awhile…would you call me an impatient woman?

I’ve fully admitted I’m more of a “boot camp” over “baby steps” kind of girl. So, I stretched my neck with both hands on my head until…ZING!!

I managed to pull a muscle in my neck. Conveniently on the opposite side of my tension headache.

*****

Chiropractor doing adjustment on female patient.  White background.

Friday Afternoon at my Emergency Chiropractor’s Visit:

He REFUSED to do an adjustment because my muscles were too inflamed. AND, he made me take X-Rays.

*sulking*

Sonofa%$^&@!

*****

So I spent my Labor Day weekend on the couch with an ice pack behind my head.

*****

Fast Forward to Tuesday Afternoon’s Chiropractor’s Visit:

Entering the exam room with the excitement of what I can only describe as medicinal glee – not unlike children who skip on playgrounds – my doctor slapped my X-rays up on the chart.

Doc:  “Take a look!”

Me:  *stares at the underwire from my bra that shows up* Awkward!

Doc:  “See that.” (points to my hips) “Your left hip is sitting lower than your other one. I’m betting your headaches stem from a bigger issue. When did you stop growing?”

Me:  *stares at floor, mumbles* “Middle School”

Doc:  (laughing) “Well, we’re gonna measure your legs today and see if my hypothesis is true. But you see how your spine kind of curves from your hips and then over-corrects itself again at the base of your skull?”

Me:  “Sooo, you’re saying I’m deformed?”

Doc:  “Yes, exactly.”

Me:  “And I probably have a gimp?”

Doc:  “Most likely.”

*****

So according to my X-ray, my profile picture should look like Nosferatu.

I figure in a few years, I’ll only post pictures of my good side. (which will be what? My left earlobe? God, I hope something stays in place.)

For now, I’ll just take my gimp leg with me and go back to icing.

How was your week?

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