Tag Archives: dinner party

How to Host a Party from the Floor

I’ve been entertaining lately.  February is the month containing the two parties my boyfriend and I throw together.  The Superbowl and The Oscars.  I’ve been scrambling to see as many Oscar films as I can between now and the award ceremony.  So the other night I enticed one of my friends over to watch a marathon of movies by offering to cook dinner for her.

Menu:  Apricot Chili Pork Chops with Lemon and Spinach Pasta with Herb Dinner Rolls

If you’re going to force your friends to sit through six hours of cinema, I recommend basting the rolls with garlic butter and sprinkling parmesan and herbs over the top right as they walk through the door.  They’ll have to stay to taste them, and then they won’t be able to move after they’ve devoured about four.  Placing the wine bottle on the ottoman also does the trick.

By far the best taste of the evening was the pasta, extremely light and fresh, while still forcing your eyes to roll back in your head.  To make it, you just cook some angelhair pasta as normal, and in a large pan saute garlic, baby spinach, lemon juice and salt/pepper until the spinach is wilted.  Add the pasta and toss!  So delicious!

So far of the nominated best pictures I’ve seen:  Inception, Black Swan, The Social Network, Toy Story 3, The Kid’s Are All Right, and Winter’s Bone.  I still need to see:  True Grit, The Fighter, 127 Hours, and The Kings Speech.

Back to the party.  All was going exceptionally well.  We had viewed The Kids are All Right and spiked up a nice conversation on surrogacy.  To further entice my friend to stay, I rented the second season of The United States of Tara to watch a few episodes.  She can’t tell me no when I’ve brought her schizophrenic Toni Collette and comedy by Diablo Cody!

Somewhere in the middle of the fourth episode it hit me, like an all too real flashback “Live from the Wizard of Oz, it’s Dorothy trapped in a tornado!”  I instantly got the spins.  I fess up to my own body.  I know I didn’t eat much earlier today, I still wasn’t feeling very good.  But dinner was amazing, and a little wine is supposed to be good for you! Mixing in my stomach was the storm of Poseidon!  I guess red wine and cold medicine are not meant to mix.  Suddenly, I became that absurd host who kept excusing herself from the room hoping no one would notice her 5’2″ frame swaying around like Kramer on Seinfeld.  After my poor, but understanding, friend had paused the episode too many times to count, I guiltily said “I don’t feel good” and left the room again.  She finished the episode at my pleading from the bathroom afar, and like the wonderful friend she is, let herself out.  Dear Lord, how embarrassing!  I spent the next half hour lying on the bathroom floor moaning and cursing.  At least we have heated tiles.  *shakes head in shame*

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