Hey All! It’s another round robin of Life List Club advice and fun! Be sure to spend your holidays de-stressing with us and staying on track with your goals. Today, I’m happy to feature Lyn Midnight from Against the Odds who gives us her rules for life. And I’m sharing all things to be thankful for over at Pam Hawley’s Hawleyville! See you soon!
Lyn Midnight’s Rules for Life
Have I mentioned I like to make lists?
I usually use my super list-making powers for mundane things: people’s birthdays, grocery lists, and guest-posts. Only recently have I realized I’d need a whole other kind of list too. Let me explain.
There are things I know that I want. Then there are things I suspect that I need. Finally, there are things I may want and/or need but absolutely know they’re bad for me. Anyone relating so far? Basically, I made a Rules for Life list. That way, whenever I need some perspective or reminding, the list does both for me. If I’m tempted to do something I shouldn’t do, I look at the list. Granted, sometimes I do it anyway… live and learn, right? But at least I can’t say I didn’t warn me.
To show you what I mean, I’ve included my list below. Feel free to share your own list of Rules for Life or comment on mine. Some items have been omitted for personal reasons. Some other items should have been… maybe. Also, you might notice that the reason I made this list of rules was because of a guy… or a series of ‘wrong guys’ to be exact. Come on, everyone should have related by now!
RULES FOR LIFE:
1. NEVER fall for the same guy twice. NEVER go backwards.
Obviously, I don’t want to go back. Falling for someone and having my heart stomped on once is enough, thank you very much. Moving onto the next heartbreak… at least it’s a step forward.
2. Do NOT fall (or sleep with) a friend.
Ahem. I might as well stamp ‘friend whore’ on my forehead. Let’s just say I’ve been known to fall for my guy friends… which probably has some Freudian explanation I don’t feel like sharing here. However, I do realize I must break the pattern. Friendship should be more important than love/sex. Period.
3. Do NOT dwell on anything.
As you may know, I have my degree in Psychology. This one time I read a paper about men and women’s different styles of coping. If something bad happens, women jump into analyzing what went wrong and venting, while men just ignore and push it aside while they look for appropriate solutions to their problems. To be honest, I’d like to be a guy for this reason alone. They don’t over-analyze or get stuck in over-thinking loops of madness. And this is where I remind myself that I can actually LEARN to do the same. Surprisingly, I’ve gotten better at it with practice.
4. Only consider available guys.
One would think I know this already. Alas, my super self-sabotaging powers override my super list-making ones. Not sure where the desire to humiliate and hurt myself comes from, but it’s very important to keep the emotionally stunted boogie monsters at bay. List-worthy.
5. This item has been omitted. Bloody good one though.
6. Do NOT bring your phone on a night out.
Whoops, I’ve been breaking this rule. I keep hoping that I can keep my phone on me when I go out, and then I make a blunder such as calling or texting someone I should not be calling or texting.
7. Do things as soon as you can.
Postponing’s my bitch. And we’ll live happily ever after…
8. Sleep 8 hours, eat healthy, and stay energized.
Let’s see… I’ve been sleeping 10 hours (bitten by the unemployment bug… or is it called the crisis bug now?). I’ve been eating nothing but Subway, beans, and sweets. Apparently, they mix well together. And I have been stoked on Coca Cola instead of making coffee like a normal person. Sigh.
9. WRITE YOUR BOOKS.
I really wish I didn’t have to include this in the list…
10. Turn every negative thought into a positive one.
This is the big one. If I could do that on a regular basis, I know I’d live a happier life. (Duh.) Even though it’s not as easy as it sounds, the rewards are huge. And lasting. Just ask Dr. Seligman, the foremost specialist in Positive Psychology. I’d definitely give his books a read if I were you.
Now then… give me YOUR rules. I always love good company in list-making!
Lyn Midnight writes in various genres and formats (fantasy, scifi, poetry), and likes to blog about anything her heart desires over at Lyn Midnight Against the Odds. She is currently working on a scifi novel and managing another blog – The Burning of Innocence – where she posts fantasy flash chapters. The person behind the handle is a Psychology graduate and eternal nomad, trying to make her big break somewhere in England. Long live the Queen! And long live our dreams.
Hello, hello! The holiday season approaches and it’s another blog hop edition of the Life List Club! For those of you already stressing as to how to get everything done, you know the shopping, the cleaning, the cooking, the writing, the errands, the social gatherings, the donation requests, the pounding of your head on your desktop, rest at ease! Pam Hawley from Hawleyville is here to guide us through! So grab some hot cocoa, marshmallows are on the table, and settle in.
Holiday Sanity Survival Kits for Writers
A few weekends ago, Lee and I gave our ferret Vinnie a bath. Every once in a while, he gets a little itchy and … well, smelly. As you can see by the expression on his face, he’s not exactly fond of bath time. I’m pretty sure he thinks we’ve devised some new form of weasel torture. Vin isn’t the first ferret to share my home, and this has been a trait all of them have shared. Wet weasels just aren’t happy.
The thing is, they always feel so much better after bath time. They may not care about being soft, fluffy and good-smelling, but they’re definitely happy not to be itchy anymore. Like it or not, a bath now in then is a good thing.
As we kick off another holiday season, I’m feeling a bit like Vinnie during bath time. I’m a WWDJ (Writer with a Day Job), so the season of adding even more to the to-do list always puts me in a panic. I’m an introvert who needs quiet time to reflect, recharge and write. The thought of adding shopping, decorating, family gatherings and the inevitable round of parties to my already crazy schedule has me feeling like a weasel in a bath – all washed up.
But just like a little ferret shampoo and water is a good thing for Vin, the holiday season that puts me in such a tizzy is also good for me. Time celebrating and being thankful with family and friends is a precious gift, and something worth making room for in our lives.
So, what does an introverted writer who is already pulled in too many directions do when life is about to get even busier? If you’re anything like me, you’re putting together your survival kit. During the Season of Social Fun, it is more important than ever to have those things that help you relax and recharge close at hand. Making a little time each day to spend with my handy-dandy survival kit revitalizes both me and my writing. My kit includes:
My reward at the end of a busy day is to curl up on my couch with my trusty friend, even if it is only for a little while. What I love best about my Kindle is that I can stock it up with plenty of reading choices without having to lug around a small library. I’ve got short stories, favorites to re-read, new authors to try, and plenty of writing advice at my fingertips. Inspiration, lessons and pure guilty pleasure are all there for the taking.
As much fun as the holidays will be, they will hijack some of my creative mojo. For an introvert, being zapped during incredibly social times is just a fact of life. So when I sit down to write and the words won’t come, I grab my camera and head off for a photography session. My subjects are simple – my ferret, my cat, or even the mailbox in my front yard. Sometimes the pictures are awful, and sometimes they come out great. Either way, I’m clearing my head and forcing myself to look at something ordinary in a new light. That simple act reconnects me to my creative spirit.
For those busy days when there just isn’t time to sit and type, I keep a pen and notebook handy. I’m not going to write my novel that way, but I can jot down snippets and random ideas or observations that I may use down the road. Again, it is about not leaving my creativity behind even when running at top speed.
There is nothing more calming and soothing than to sit and pet my cat Sly while he head-butts my Kindle or purrs in my lap. There is nothing more energizing than watching Vin bounce around my bedroom making happy “clucking” noises and doing the “weasel war dance.” Sly’s lazy yawns and stretches are a constant reminder that the world won’t stop turning if I take a few minutes to yawn and stretch myself. Vin’s playful hops are a reminder that life should be lived with joy in every step.
During the holidays, it is even more important to recharge ourselves if we want to stay on track with our goals. These are my tools for dealing with life at top speed. Do you know what belongs in your survival kit? If not, figure it out before you think about buying gifts, cooking turkeys or digging out the decorations.. Your kit might look very different from mine. Maybe it is a favorite video game and your comfiest chair or a stack of funny movies, a bottle of wine and scented candles. It doesn’t matter WHAT you have in your kit, as long as it makes you breathe a huge sigh of relief at the end of a busy day.
What gets you through the busier times in your life? What helps you relax and recharge so that you can enjoy all the fun of the holiday season while still making progress in your goals?
In addition to short fiction, Pam Hawley writes humor pieces and is working on her first novel, which blends the creepy and the funny by bringing a brutally murdered “player” back to life as a naked ghost. Her short story “A Wingding and A Prayer” appeared in the July issue of eFiction Magazine (available at http://www.efictionmag.com). Her short horror fiction, “Peanut Butter and Jelly,” will appear in The Spirit of Poe Anthology available at http://literarylandmarkpress.blogspot.com. When not working, writing or in the gym, Pam can most likely be found curled up on her couch reading, hanging out at her family pub Hawley’s in Baltimore, or cheering the Pittsburgh Steelers. She blogs regularly at http://hawleyville.wordpress.com.
It’s time for another exciting episode of the Life List Club! Remember, the Life List Club is a place for anyone to find support and ideas toward fulfilling their life goals. Every other friday, our LLC Contributors (who can all be found in the LLC Sidebar) guest post on what advice they can help with toward achieving goals. We’re honest, full of laughs, true friends, and we’re here to support you! Join us by commenting, making your own Life List page on your blog, or rolling in the fun over at our twitter party #LifeListClub.
Today I bring you technical writer, Diana Ligaya. I’m guest posting at the hilariously coy Lyn Midnight’s blog and sharing my bizarre true life dream series with you. Please come say hi! Diana, take it away!
Living in the Eleventh Hour
While the occasional eleventh hour save may be thrilling once or twice, living in the eleventh hour is never a good idea. Not only does your project suffer but over time, you will suffer as well. You may soon discover that the stress of constantly working to the eleventh hour outweighs the “payoff” at the end.
So what can you do to avoid living in the eleventh hour? The first step is to figure out what it is that makes you a chronic procrastinator. If you are one of those types that gets a “thrill” out of beating the clock, remind yourself of the stress you feel in the moment by writing it down. Then make it a point to not go to the eleventh hour on your very next project. If you find yourself living in the eleventh hour because you routinely take on too much, pare down your workload, if possible.
Do you live in the eleventh hour? If so, why? What are your tips for avoiding it?
Diana Ligaya has been fascinated with science and technology ever since she could remember. Her voracious appetite for stories and thirst for adventure led her to explore the infinite worlds of speculative fiction.
She loves everything from hard science fiction to post-apocalyptic dystopias and everything in between. She prefers to mix aspects of sub-genres within her work rather than sticking to a “standard” genre framework. When she’s not working on her fiction credits, Diana works from home as a freelance writer, specializing in technology. She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband, their daughter and their mutt.