Quite Possibly the Worst Wedding Dream Ever
A few nights ago I had the craziest wedding dream yet!
You already know about my weird dream where I was on the road to interrogate a killer, but stopped to crash someone’s wedding reception just to take notes on what I liked and disliked about it. Note* I do NOT like Skittles as party favors.
But this last dream was far more outlandish!
First off, my dress started out as my real wedding gown, but somewhere in the dream it morphed into a gaudy black sequin and lace ensemble with layers of petticoats underneath and puff sleeves!
I came out to greet everyone and ran into my friend, Cat.
“How’s my hair look?” I asked.
She wouldn’t answer me. She just kept prattling on about other things! I begged her to go to the restroom with me so I could see my hair in the mirror. It had been styled by a team of professionals and I badly wanted to see how it turned out.
When we finally got to the bathroom, Cat tried to block me from the mirror. I managed to step around her and catch my reflection.
The top of my head was a beehive of curls, mounded in a great glump. The back of my hair was a mohawk, gelled straight out to a point!
That’s not even the worst part.
The bridal headpiece that was sewn into my hair can only be described as a large purple hula-hoop that was covered, and I mean COVERED, in women’s underpants!
I didn’t know what to do. Where does one even begin to fix a headdress that dangles lady knickers?
I went in search of my family.
When I got to the reception hall, guests were milling about restlessly. A few were seated at tables with odd chairs and stained linens. The staff on hand were way behind cleaning up from a prior event, so nothing was ready for us! There were hardly any chairs for people to sit on, and there was nothing for them to eat or drink but a few water glasses one staff member was lazily dropping ice cubes into, one by one, with a tongs.
Someone had asked our entertainment for the night to start performing, so the side room was filled with Asian dancers moving melodically. But no one was watching them. Because there were no chairs to sit on, guests assumed they were not supposed to be in that room yet. Only a few people who stood in the doorway witnessed any of the dancers we invited.
I started looking for my family again and saw my father, who was carrying in the wedding cake. He was dressed in a Bill Cosby-esque sweater! For his daughter’s wedding?!
Apparently that was the last straw as I woke up right after that, but WOW! I mean, what a circus!
I sat up in bed, stupefied. I turned, looking at Joe, “I had a nightmare.”
Here’s hoping our wedding will include less crazy hair and more of this…
What about you? Had any weird dreams lately?
Serial Wedding Zombies: When TV Takes Over Your Dreams
I’ve been a having a series of morbid dreams lately. I blame late night television. Marathons of Dexter, The Following, and The Walking Dead are starting to take their toll.
Seriously! Dreams about tracking serial killers, zombie attacks, and injecting tranquilizers in my enemies are happening on a regular basis at bedtime. And what’s worse is that these crime thriller/apocalyptic shows are blending themselves with my everyday life. Including wedding planning.
Here’s one of my latest
My brother, Justin, and I are on a road trip to go kill a guy.
Cause that’s what older siblings are good for.
But the guy we’re coming after is a total scuzzball, so he deserves what’s coming to him. Problem is…we have to find him first. So we make a pit stop at this party to talk to another guy who can tell us where the first guy – the guy we want to kill (still with me?) – is.
Now, the party we go to ends up being someone’s wedding ceremony. So as we’re sneaking in, I stop us and pull up a chair to watch the wedding and start taking notes about what I like and don’t like about their ceremony.
I did not like the fact that they handed out skittles to everyone. Half of the guests dropped theirs on the ground, which is a safety hazard, and the other half had sticky palms. Ew.
We end up finding the guy we needed to talk to, and we bully him a little to get information. Then we head back to the car to take off again.
Are you ready for this?
My brother has dropped skittles all over the inside of the car and I’m furious at him for making a sticky mess on the car seats.
That’s when I woke up.
Here’s how the conversation with my fiance, Joe, went that morning:
Me: “Strange dream.”
Joe: “What’d you dream about?”
Me: “I planned to kill a guy. But I got distracted by candy.”
Joe: “Sounds about right.”
Had any weird dreams lately?
Popular Dream Meanings: Or Why Your Teeth Are Falling Out
Welcome to the Guinea Pig Diaries – a monthly dive into different topics, and this month we’re talking about SLEEP! Wondering about setting a better sleep routine, check out Snooze is Not the Answer. Got a partner who snores? Go read It Might Get Loud.
Today, we’re talking about dreams.
Do you ever have a reoccurring dream? Have you wondered what it means? Dreams can have a variety of meanings and purposes in our lives; they can show us what we wish for, what we fear, and sometimes we can even speak to loved ones we’ve lost.
The most common type of dream is the Release Dream.
Release dreams serve their purpose by getting rid of the mental stress we carry around during the day. They can be nonsensical, humorous, and even scary. Nightmares are a form of release dreams – because they show us the worst case scenario. They also show us, however, that we can survive. Our subconscious is shocking us to let us know what we’re capable of accepting and dealing with.
What You Should Know About Nightmares:
Have you or someone you know had a reoccurring dream that a loved one becomes injured or dies? Nightmares like this are disturbing, no doubt, but it doesn’t mean they’re a premonition of something bad to happen. If we fear something with our conscious during the day, our subconscious stores it and releases it when we’re asleep. And again, it’s to show us we’ll survive – even if in our dreams we don’t.
I can think of a very particular nightmare I used to have again and again as a child. I dreamed that I was kidnapped. I was probably around 7 or 8 years old when a man came to our house and knocked on our door. Being that my father owned a cake business, we commonly had customers stop by to return cake fixtures from parties and such so I thought nothing of strange people at our door. This guy drove a beat up old truck and asked if my parents were home. I said they were and to step inside, I’d go get them. He immediately said, “Oh, that’s ok, nevermind…”, turned and left. When I told my mom and sister what happened, they were instantly alarmed. And I remember my sister looking out the window to catch sight of his truck and she called the police. I didn’t know I should have been scared, but their reaction did the trick. For several nights following, I suffered the nightmare that I was taken from my family. It left me scared to even be on the playground at school without other students or teachers around. Thankfully, I never saw the man again, and I’ve never been taken from my family against my will.
What About The Dreams Where My Teeth Fall Out???
Opposite of nightmares, release dreams can encompass those totally whacked out dreams we have too! You know, the ones where gorillas surround the house and take over the birdfeeder!!
Moving along! They’re called a release dream because they’re releasing the stuff our conscious collects throughout the day. When I was reading The Hunger Games trilogy, you should have SEEN the dreams I was having! And don’t get me started on my dreams following The Walking Dead.
Dreams About Your Teeth or Hair Falling Out:
Certain reoccurring dreams can have an archetypal meaning. A common one is the dream that all your teeth are falling out!
If you’re dreaming about your teeth, or hair, falling out it could mean you’re feeling vulnerable or embarrassed in some way. Perhaps you said something you wished you hadn’t or maybe you’re worried about getting old and afraid people won’t see you the same way. Both would be triggered by stress, so do whatever calming techniques work best for you – especially before bedtime – to put these dreams to rest (pun intended).
Dreams About the Weather – Storms, Waves, and Tornadoes:
Different form, same as above. Emotional stress. When we feel overwhelmed, we have the saying that “we’re drowning.” That phrase comes from somewhere! Emotional turbulence can take a physical form in our dreams through perilous natural elements because our minds recognize these forces as dangerous and requiring caution.
Dreams About Animals:
Dreams About Stairs or Mazes: