I’ve been a having a series of morbid dreams lately. I blame late night television. Marathons of Dexter, The Following, and The Walking Dead are starting to take their toll.
Seriously! Dreams about tracking serial killers, zombie attacks, and injecting tranquilizers in my enemies are happening on a regular basis at bedtime. And what’s worse is that these crime thriller/apocalyptic shows are blending themselves with my everyday life. Including wedding planning.
Here’s one of my latest nightmares adventures:
My brother, Justin, and I are on a road trip to go kill a guy.
Cause that’s what older siblings are good for.
But the guy we’re coming after is a total scuzzball, so he deserves what’s coming to him. Problem is…we have to find him first. So we make a pit stop at this party to talk to another guy who can tell us where the first guy – the guy we want to kill (still with me?) – is.
Now, the party we go to ends up being someone’s wedding ceremony. So as we’re sneaking in, I stop us and pull up a chair to watch the wedding and start taking notes about what I like and don’t like about their ceremony.
I did not like the fact that they handed out skittles to everyone. Half of the guests dropped theirs on the ground, which is a safety hazard, and the other half had sticky palms. Ew.
We end up finding the guy we needed to talk to, and we bully him a little to get information. Then we head back to the car to take off again.
Except….
Are you ready for this?
My brother has dropped skittles all over the inside of the car and I’m furious at him for making a sticky mess on the car seats.
That’s when I woke up.
*****
Here’s how the conversation with my fiance, Joe, went that morning:
Me: “Strange dream.”
Joe: “What’d you dream about?”
Me: “I planned to kill a guy. But I got distracted by candy.”
Joe: “Sounds about right.”
Had any weird dreams lately?
Jess Witkins' Happiness Project 
Well, this changes everything. I’m not coming to your wedding if there aren’t any Skittles. LOL.
I don’t remember dreams vividly like some people do. Usually, I just wake up with a few disjointed scenes in my head and a weird vibe running through my body. I did appreciate the dream I once had where my best friend who’d died was calling me from a place I can only describe as Heaven’s Waiting Room. She apologized for taking so long to check in with me, but the line was long and there was only one phone. I guess Heaven was behind on getting cell phones. LOL.
I’ve had a very vivid dream about a friend who passed too. They say when it’s vivid and a friend it’s likely a spiritual visit. 🙂
What do you expect when you’re planning a wedding. Sugar roses and satin? It’s a tough job!
Well I did NOT have zombies on the guest list! LOL
About six months ago, I had a series of violent dreams. Ones in which I was killing people, too. They freaked me out to the point that I actually googled it. Found out I was not alone. Whew! Of course, when I found out the others like me were Jeffrey Dahmer, Ted Bundy and Gary Ridgway, I was less comforted.
Kidding about that. They were normal people.
My dreams have been pretty normal ever since, so I guess it was just a passing murderous phase.
Were you watching a lot of thriller TV shows at the time? After marathon watching The Following ALL my dreams involved hunting down a murderer or following a cult or some such craziness.
Interestingly enough, when I was watching American Horror Story, I didn’t have any dreams from that even though that show is almost creepier in its gore factor. Do you watch either?
No. I watched part of the first season of American Horror Story but gave it up. I do watch The Walking Dead and a lot of Dateline/true crime stuff, though.
I’m already sad that there’s only one more walking dead episode this season.
The Danger Zone is The Rainbow!
What’s that from? I’m not familiar with it.
Taste the Rainbow — Skittles.
and “Hiiiiii waaaaaay tooooo the DANGER ZONE!” — Kenny Loggins
(Archer)
Ahhh, got it! That’s a great song. 🙂
Ha ha! The exchange with your fiancé is funny.
Yah, I once said to him that I was “eclectic.” And he responded by saying, “I know you’re eccentric.”
*rolls eyes*
No more TV before bed! What a weird dream!
I don’t have dreams like that but my Hubs did the other night. it was too scary weird for him to relate it all to me but he did say his deceased mother was a devil and was attacking him while they were in her former bedroom. His father’s sister was also there. He didn’t understand her part in the dream. The whole thing sounded a little like the dream sequence in Fiddler on The Roof.
I love Joe’s response – he knows you so well.
Yikes, your hubby’s dream does sound creepy. Joe’s been having weird dreams too. Must mean we’re both under a lot of stress because our “worst case scenario” dreams all involve epic battles of some sort. LOL
ALL my dreams are strange, but seldom violent. I usually end up never getting where I’m trying to go in the dream.
I wake up in the night and what’s weird is that my dreams pick up where I left off. Isn’t that strange? I’m not sure they’re supposed to do that. *shrug*
Ha,ha! That is funny, Jess. Good to know that in the future, you will not be able to “kill” anyone unless everything else is in order.
I have dreams about black bears getting me. Often. And some sexual dreams as well, but not with bears. Dreams are just so bizarre!
I use to have reoccurring dreams about gorillas trying to break into our house! And they kept eating all our birdseed… Yah, I have NO CLUE what that means.
Do you dislike Skittles? Do you dream of candy often?
No on all accounts. I have no explanation for it.
LOL- never drop the candy! My last dream had me caring for a baby with blue lizard skin, I can’t remember much else.
Ooh cool! When my sister was pregnant, I dreamt she had twin mermaid babies! Lol
Yeah, because you have to take notes before you go find (and kill) the guy. You would have never known that what would happen if the guests were given candy during the ceremony. 😀
Awesome!
I love Joe’s reaction. LOL.
Last night, I dreamed that I decided to buy a car. I planned to march into the car dealership, tell ’em what I was paying, and hand them a check. It was a freaking dream about buying a sensible hybrid (which I need to do), but my dream could’ve had me buying a Model S. Sheesh. Stupid subconscious.
I kinda dislike real life dreams because when you wake up you realize you haven’t actually accomplished any tasks you just dreamed you did. #sadface
Well, I haven’t had any crazy dreams lately, but my husband has had three within about as many weeks about pooping in front of people (which is an activity he avoids at all costs…actually so do I). We haven’t figured out what that means either, but is brain is trying to tell him something, other than don’t poop in front of people.
Bahahahahahaha! That is the funniest dream sequence ever! You need to watch the video in my blog post Do You Poop at Work? I bet you’ll bust a gut laughing. Good luck deciphering that one out!
I saw it, and it was hilarious!
Ah, pooping and Skittles, sounds like a regular Friday night for me. Wait, what? I may have mixed my messages there. 😉
Lots of strange dreams lately, none that I can form into a coherent sentence. The poop at work video is BRILLIANT! LOL
Glad I made you laugh! I don’t have anything against skittles but in my dream I was most adamant they not make an appearance at my wedding. Ha!
[…] already know about my weird dream where I was on the road to interrogate a killer, but stopped to crash someone’s wedding reception just to take notes on what I liked and […]