Tag Archives: funny

My Husband and I Cannot Be Trusted to Pick Out “Our Song”

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Me and the Hubs

My husband and I are celebrating two years of marriage this month. And we’ve been a couple for a decade.

We should probably have a song picked out by now.

I mean, we kinda do. We have the song we first danced to. The song we sang at our wedding. We’ve recorded two CDs for family covering songs we love. Given my husband is a professional musician, there is no shortage of music in our home.

Yet, on a recent car trip, a specific song came on the radio and Joe’s eyes lit up in excitement as he said, “Do you know what this is?”

I didn’t.

“Think Tia Carrere.”

It was Dreamweaver by Gary Wright.

“This should be our song,” said Joe.

“Um, I’m not sure I agree with that. Even if it is the soundtrack for a great scene in Wayne’s World.”

I politely suggested another song.

Bird on a Wire by Aaron Neville.

And that, is when my husband gave me a look that said “we will not be figuring out what our song is today.”

Also, he was less than enthused when I started playing this song after he exited the bathroom later that day. *shrug* I still say it’s got a good groove.

What’s your song? How did you choose it?
What song recommendation do you have for Joe and I?
Because clearly, 
we can’t be trusted.

What I Was Up To While I Was Away

office selfieHi Friends,

I’ve missed you. How the heck are each of you?!

I’ve been busy working on projects. Lots of projects!

So, here’s what I was up to while I was away…

***

Co-Hosting a Film Screening

That’s right! My talented and inspiring new friend, Stephanie Sharp, invited me to co-host a private screening of the indie arts collaboration film, Indie Kindred.

Are you ready to get inspired? Watch this!

The film and movement behind Indie Kindred comes from storyteller and filmmaker, Jen Lee. You might recall that name when I talked about The 10 Letters Project, which another local writer and I are emulating in a local magazine.

Indie Kindred is the story of makers paving their own paths, finding other creatives they can work with, and collaborating to make something good. Indie + Kindred + Collaboration.

So, 2 weeks ago, about a dozen of us makers (artists, designers,chefs, writers, and repurposers) met in Stephanie’s home for some good food, show and tell, a film screening and makers chat. Most of us did not know each other. Now, we’ve created our own private group of local makers online and have plans for a second gathering and retreat! Because as Jen Lee so eloquently puts it “Doing it yourself, doesn’t mean do it alone.”

Interested in hosting your own screening or meeting other makers? There’s a public facebook community for Indie Kindred!

Driftless Area Makers cover photo
A sampling of the work shown at our makers meetup.

Held Auditions and Cast a Show

Three days. Eleven hours. Almost 40 auditioners. And now…we have a cast!!!

La Crosse joins 40 other cities giving motherhood a microphone in our debut, live, on-stage storytelling event, Listen to Your Mother! I’m so pleased to be working with each of the cast members we selected to share their stories and to raise funds for our local YWCA who has worked to end racism and empower women and girls.

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Behind the scenes at auditions. 

Here’s an accurate account of my life right now…

raccoon

And here’s what I came across on the internet and thought you might enjoy…

Me whenever anyone offers me caffeine lately. 

This Tumblr account that imagines Kylo Ren living at home with Han and Leia. 

kylo ren

This comedian talking about what we do when the doorbell rings.

(found via the hilarious Darla of She’s a Maineiac)

This book we bought for our nephew. Ok, actually for his parents. 

You can’t beat this hilarious bedtime story for adults.

***

That’s what I was up to while I was away.
What have YOU been up to, friends?

The Internet Gave Us These Amazing Gifts

18494555212_018fa1e261_z (1)The wide world of the interwebs has been on a role lately. It gave us these amazing gifts and scattered them across our Facebook feeds, blog readers, twitter timelines, and one of my particularly favorite time wasters, YouTube, and its endless rabbit hole of clips to watch.

With the new year already flying by, friends and family alike are feeling overwhelmed. Adding in the loss of David Bowie and Alan Rickman only heightened all “the feels” and I think we could all use a little entertainment that makes us smile, or better yet, bust a gut laugh.

I Give You These Gifts the Internet Gave Us

Go Ahead and Laugh

Because everyone loves a good pun, Comedy Central sent out the hashtag request to #InternetABook, and Buzzfeed collected 29 Hilarious Literary Internet Puns. Don’t judge me, but my favorite one was “Moby Dick Pic.” I died laughing.

Reaching ERMAGHERD status – James Corden and Tom Hanks acted out Hanks’s film career in a matter of minutes and it’s spectacular.

Stop everything you’re doing right now and take this quiz. Wes Anderson has to be one of my all time favorite film directors. I will watch anything that man creates, even if it was an ad revival to bring back yellow pages on the home shopping network. (But why would anyone want that?) Anyway…

Who Would You End Up With in a Wes Anderson movie? 

I got: Jane from The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou

“You and Jane share a tenacity and a love of words. Whether you’re also a journalist or not, you’re always searching for the truth and greater meaning in life, just like Jane. You’d make an effing great duo.”
Touchstone

Brace yourselves, children, because Anne of Green Gables is back! 

Breaking Bad Writer is Bringing Anne of Green Gables back to Television

Or check out celebrity nano-impressions by Ross Marquand! See celebrity impressions in common day snafus. My fave: Brad Pitt forgets what he was going to say.

 

In honor of Alan Rickman, let’s talk about that time he pranked Harry Potter with a fart machine. Don’t you wish you were a fly on that set?

And Now For Some Self-Care Super-Stories

August McLaughlin is my sister from another mother, and she penned this awesome post about 5 Empowering Questions to Ask Yourself Daily for a Groovier, More Impactful Life. I am all about the side hustle right now.

Kirsten Weiss of the Para Your Normal blog shared 5 Mantras to Boost Your Magick. Let’s just say, the universe has been telling me this for awhile, and I’m ready to listen.

My friend Liz from Be. Love. Live. is offering free life coaching now – and I jumped at the chance. Liz has 20 years of experience as a mentor and coach and her blog is one of my favorite motivational/inspirational blogs. It’s real, she’s on a journey too, and it’s full of her beautiful photography not stupid posters with kittens hanging from tree branches. (Note* I have nothing against kittens on tree branches.) Check out Living Intentionally: How to Take Control of Your Life One Moment at a Time.

“Raise your hand if you’ve felt completely overwhelmed sometime in the last six months.” That’s the comaraderie you’ll find with Heather at Hiya Tootsie who gifts us with How to Handle the Overwhelm: a 6 part strategy.

If inspirational just isn’t your thing, then I leave you with Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck. He’s got this thing figured out, and it’s funny.

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What’s been making you laugh this week?
How are you following your dreams? 

 

Before I Met Keanu Reeves, I Also Ran Into Bigfoot

Many of you now know about my serendipitous run-in with Keanu Reeves. I still don’t understand quite how that happened, but I’m glad it did as it was awesome. What you don’t know is that I also ran into Bigfoot.

Jess Witkins Meets Keanu Reeves

I was planning to write a very different story for my blog that weekend. A story about a hiking trip that Joe and I went on.

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I know, I know, we all know how THAT goes. One of us ends up missing

And to that I say, at least we’re consistent, which is a prime foundation to have in a marriage, especially when one party may have pooped their pants while hiking thereby ruining all shreds of romance forever. 

So before Joe and I ended up at the bar where I glanced out the window and commented “That guy looks like Keanu,” we were hiking.

IMG_6058Sure, sure, this is exactly how it’s supposed to look. I always crawl through death branches to get from point A to point B. 

True to form, Joe rarely lets me pick what direction we go since I’m supposedly the one that got us lost the first time. But then, he went and picked a trail that looks like this!

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Me: “Well this looks like a dark and treacherous path.” 

Joe: “I’ve made my peace with it.” 

It doesn’t even phase him anymore!

When we crept upon the creepiest cavern looking structure, we debated.

Me: “Oh look at that. I bet that’s the witch’s cabin.” 

Joe: “That’s just a rock formation.” 

Me: “That’s what she wants you to think.” 

Amazingly, we were not witch-napped and forced to eat sweets until our bellies burst and no one made pies out of our intestines and such. But it was a close call, lemme tell you.

On a sunnier trail, we fell into one of our usual conversations comparing our relationship to various film or book references. You know, a “you’re Wild Bill Hickock and I’m Calamity Jane from Deadwood” or “you’re Lonestar from Spaceballs, but I’m Dot not Princess Vespa.”

And then Joe tried to sum us up with this…

Joe: “The difference between us is that I’m more crass, but you have the dirtier mind.” 

Me: *leans in really close to his ear and whispers* “You’re welcome.” 

And then this is the part where I’m guessing Joe got sun poisoning. Or temporarily possessed by aliens because I shot this photo….

IMG_6083Pretty funky lighting, amirite?

And then he did this…

Who knew, Bigfoot’s in Wisconsin?!

*****

How was your week everyone? 

Why I’ll Never Be a Teen Model

I am not a photogenic person. I never have been. I simply don’t have one of those faces that effortlessly looks amazing all the time.

I have one of those faces that requires work. It is great for making really awkward faces. I have a big nose, that scrunches up when I show any kind of emotion, and I have gigantic teeth. No, literally my teeth are so big, I’ve had NINE removed, and I still have a full set of teeth.

You may be thinking, “That’s…a fun fact. Thanks for sharing?” 

You’re welcome.

Those selfies you see on my instagram account probably required like 20 or more shots. My photo collections from trips I take or events I’m involved in are all staged. You will not find candids, because when people try to take candids of me, they look like this…
That is a real, undoctored photo my husband took of me while storytelling.

And I was telling a funny story! Why do I look so…so…annoyed? 

Have you ever watched America’s Next Top Model, that show hosted by Tyra Banks? She’s always telling the girls to smile with their eyes, she calls it SMIZE. Well, if the photos from above are any indication, the only contest I’m going to win is for the smier – I can sneer with my eyes, you guys. Or maybe it’s smudge? Cause I’m judging you with my eyes. All I know is, look at that epic scowl, folks?

Master-level-ninja-force-facial-attitude.

And that’s why I’ll never be a teen model.

Also I’m pretty sure there’s an age clause in the contract that requires the model to in fact, BE a teenager. But I haven’t looked into it, who knows? 

How do you feel about photos of yourself?
Do you know how to smize or better yet, smier? 

9 Things That Make Me Anxious (And 3 Things That Are Fun)

Ugh, adulting can be so exhausting. Do any of you ever wish you could flashback for, like, just a day to sometime in high school when you didn’t have as much responsibiity?

(If you hated high school, pick a weekend instead of a school day, that’s fine with me – this is a no judgment time travel zone.)

I mean, go back to a time where you didn’t have to worry about, or really even know the meaning of words like: insurance, utilities, deductible, probiotics, fiber, and retinol creams. 

Being an adult carries a lot of duty, people depend on you, which in turn can cause a lot of stress. But then there are also the little things?

Please tell me I’m not alone here. 

9 Things That Make Me Anxious

don't panic, silhouette man running away

1. Public Toilet Seats That are a Askew

How do I know whether it’s going to stay put or slide around like a saucer on a snowbank?

2. Merging into Traffic More than Once

You know those roads where you first have to merge onto a road built for merging onto the road you actually want to be on, so you are in fact merging twice to get where you want to go, and everyone is driving like an extra in Fast and Furious 93?

3. Opening Presents in Front of People

There’s too much pressure to make meaningful and unique comments over each gift. I’d rather open it privately and write you a beautiful thank you note.

4. Epic Stare Downs With Animals While Driving

I’m talking to you, squirrels. What is all this scampering into the road, then back to the sidewalk, then out into the road and freezing when my car comes upon you? I’m just on my way to the mall. I don’t want to play Russian Roulette with you! And I am not slowing down my vehicle. Cross or don’t cross, decide!

5. That Weird Science Myth About How We’re Never More Than Three Feet Away From a Spider

I know it’s a myth, but I also know they’re out there. And they’re plotting against us.

6. That Weird Science Fact About the Large Quantity of Insects We Eat in our Food, Namely Chocolate

I try to forget this every day.

7. Paintings That Look at You No Matter Where You Stand

Just cut it out, ok?!

8. Clowns. 

Oh yah, sure, be right there… Nope. 

9. Anytime I Have to Reach for a Dish on the Top Shelf

I’m convinced I will likely break 4 others on the way down.

Am I weird? Do you think about this stuff too? 

*****

Let’s move on to better topics.

Here are 3 Things That Are Fun

1. This post about Halloween costume advice.

I wrote this back in 2011, but it’s still full of great tips (and photos) to help you get creative this Halloween!

2. My improv show is this week!!!

I can’t wait to tell Improvised Tales of Terror to you! Check out the radio ad I got to do voiceover work on. 🙂 Local friends, please come to the show!

3. October’s #ScreamingScreening is in full swing!

While not as big, or serendipitous as #Keanuthon, we’re still having movie nights every wednesday, and October is all about the scary movies! Join in, and if you like, tweet at me (@jesswitkins) and hashtag it #ScreamingScreening. What scary movies are you watching this season?

#ScreamingScreening

*****

What’s everyone else up to this week? 

Thirtying Like a Boss: Some Facts About Turning 30

FullSizeRenderI’m officially 30 years old.

I was the last grandchild born on both sides of my family, always the baby wherever we went. I must say, turning 30 feels surreal.

If I’m 30…are they all….DEAD?!!!

I’m at this weird juxtaposition where I was an adult, but not really because who’s that much of an adult as a twentysomething, but now I’m really, really an adult. Because I’m 30. I’m 30.

One would hope that with each birthday you get a little bit wiser. So today I bring you…

Some Facts About Turning 30

1. You will have mixed feelings about this. 

With societal pressures being what they are, especially if you’re a woman, turning 30 feels momentous. Because when you tell all your twentysomething friends that you’re turning 30 they see 30 as something lightyears away which causes them to respond by saying things like “Seriously? You don’t LOOK that old?” and “Oh, you’re NOT going to go out to celebrate?” And that leads me to the following internal monologue:

  • I’m sorry, you must have misheard me. I’m turning 30, not 300. There’s no reason to buy dentures and Bengay just yet. And furthermore, just because I’d prefer to stay in and celebrate with close friends rather than pub crawl my way through the occasion and wake up in last night’s mascara does not make me alien, it makes me 30. I already have dark circles under my eyes and I’m not trying to define them. 

Then when I tell my thirtysomething friends I’m turning 30 they all get this reassuring look in their eyes like they’re mentally patting my hand and inviting me to join a cult that takes ups crafts like scrapbooking and knitting. They say things like “Don’t sweat it! Your 30’s are your best years!” and “You’ll be more confident in your 30’s, enjoy it!” I think:

  • Yes, I’ve been looking forward to this growth stage. I will be a more indestructible me. I will takeover the world. … But then I remember I still don’t know how to cook anything besides baked chicken, and how the last time I tried knitting I gave myself carpel tunnel. So how will I enjoy the greatest years of my life when I still feel like such an impostor? 

2. Phrases like “enjoy it while you can” and “you’re face is going to freeze like that” take on new meanings.

I’d say somewhere between 28 and 29, eating whatever I wanted and not gaining a pound went away. Now I have a license to conceal and carry…my muffin top. As the youngest of four, I have fond memories of sibling scrabbles and epic battles of making grotesque faces at one another. Plenty of adults warned us to knock it off or else our “face was going to freeze like that.” I somewhat regret making this face so much.

Let's not talk about what's happening here.

Let’s not talk about what’s happening here.

3. You won’t have it all figured out yet, but you’re better at it. 

Your 20’s involve getting a leg up. You’ll do crap jobs to work your way up a ladder you’re not sure you want to climb, but that’s ok. Say YES! It helps you figure out what it is you DO want to do. My 20’s is when I figured out I did NOT want to do sales, but also where I learned I’m good at talking to people, being a leader, and that I wanted to get back into writing.

4. Remember all the cool girls who guided you along your way. Now you get to BE one. 

I wouldn’t be who I am today without the love and support of some amazing girlfriends. Mentors along the way who let me be me. And there are a few older ones whose wise words and attention particularly meant something. I had coworkers who gave advice and let me vent when I just needed to get my frustration out. I have professors who’ve become friends and asked for my help or had me talk with their classes. And I’ve got four older sisters who all treat me with respect and love. Now, I love love love giving that back. I love being a mentor to the college students that I meet at work and help pump up their confidence to try new things and make messes and seek opportunities. I don’t mind that when I attend conferences, I’m often sharing advice or experience instead of always getting it. I remember what it was like, and now I get to be the one that helps. That’s a great feeling.

5. You’ve lived three decades on this earth! 

In case you didn’t major in math*, I’ll add it up for you, you’ve lived three whole decades on this earth!

*I didn’t major in math, so I asked a friend. Yes, it is in fact three decades. 

You officially have experience with things. You are now old enough to make references to pop culture that young people won’t understand!

What do you mean you’ve never heard of Popples?!!

And you have friends who’ve known you half your life or more!

girlfriends-nbc-best-friends-forever-bff-ecards-someecards

Basically, 30’s not so bad. So don’t sweat it.
I plan to rock 30 like a boss. 

Cheers, everyone! 

30 Questions Before 30

I turn 30 next month.

I’ve moved on from childish behavior like eating Cheetos for dinner. Now, I am a sophisticated adult who eats Cheetos for dinner…with a glass of wine. And with better clothes, because I shop at Stitch Fix.

Afro Hair 4

Thanks for the “fashion advice,” Mom.  NOT.  

I’ve surpassed the emotional roller coaster that this new decade has been inducing. I’ve let go of “do this by the time I’m 30” deadlines. And now, I’m looking forward to it. I think 30 is going to be a great year.

I still feel the need to document my life thus far though. A lot of change and growth, and loss and love, has happened in my 20’s and I want to acknowledge it. I’d been thinking of doing some kind of 30 facts before 30 post, when lo and behold, blogger pal, Liz from Be. Love. Live shared her own 31 Questions theme. And since she invited others to join in, I’m doing just that.

Here’s 30 Questions Answered Before I Turn 30.
  1. Where’s your cellphone? If not in my hand, then it’s right next to me. I have a problem.
  2. Where’s your second half? After making us a scrumptious breakfast this morning, he is out for a run, letting me work in peace.
  3. Your hair? Is messy. I let it air dry. But the color is my natural red.
  4. Your mood? Excited. It’s going to be a good day.
  5. Your plan for today? To catch up on writing assignments and then go hiking with my bae. 
    Out for a Stroll
  6. What’s the best you know? Best I know of what? I know I like red ales and Leinenkugel’s Red is a great one. I think David Sedaris’ essay Six to Eight Black Men is the funniest thing I’ve ever read. I think sharing that story about that time I pooped my pants has made more people come forward and share their own shitastrophies, and that makes me like each of them a bit more.
  7. Your dream last night? I didn’t dream last night, or if I did, I don’t remember it. But last weekend after Joe and I binged watched Season Five of The Walking Dead, I dreamed that I was out scavenging for food and shelter all night long. I was exhausted the next morning.
  8. Your goal in life? To publish my book, and to make people laugh.
  9. The room you’re in? The kitchen, at the table by the window. The most common space I write in, and where Joe often catches me.
    Writing
  10. Your hobby? Blogging, reading, hanging out in coffee shops, doing improv, talking in weird voices, shocking my mother…

    worlds largest latteHobbying like a boss. 

  11. Your fear? Bugs.
  12. Where would you like to be in six years? Celebrating the six year anniversary of you asking me that question. 😉
  13. Where were you yesterday evening? At home with the hubs, watching The Grand Budapest Hotel.
  14. What are you not? I am not coordinated. Please don’t throw balls at me.
  15. Something you wish? I wish I had some chocolate. Like now.
  16. Where did you grow up? In a small town in southeast Wisconsin.
  17. What was the last thing you did? Watch Hannah Hart’s My Drunk Kitchen: Toad in a Hole. This girl makes me giggle.
  18. Your clothes? I’m rocking my Dolly Parton tshirt.
    Dolly Parton tee
  19. Your TV? Is a host to many epic marathons such as #Keanuthon.
  20. Your computer? Is a multi-holiday gift from my husband after my old one died. It’s a MacBook Air, and I still don’t really know how to use it. For the love of God, why can’t I just double click on things??!
  21. The best thing you own? My journals. Those notebooks hold my soul.
  22. Do you miss anyone? I miss my family. I miss the members that passed on too early. I miss friends that are kindred spirits despite living across the country.
  23. Your car? Is a 2004 Nissan Sentra, and her name is Dionne.
  24. Something you’re not wearing? Socks.
  25. Favorite store? It is quickly becoming Etsy. And does Stitch Fix count? It is a store, but you don’t go to it, it comes to you.

    Where my book nerds at? Etsy is the greatest for gifts.Where my book nerds at? 

  26. Your summer? The highlight was our annual summer vacation and road trip to Tennessee where we ate copious amounts of barbecue, listened to lots of live music, and visited with friends and family. Additional highs include storytelling at the Old School Variety Show, co-hosting part of the Film Freaks series with the library, and joining an improv troupe.
  27. Do you love anyone? Yah, there’s this boy I like.

    It’s the one on the left. 

  28. Favorite color? Green and turquoise.
  29. When did you last laugh? I laughed watching that Hannah Hart video. Did you watch it? Go watch it. She’s so silly.
  30. When did you last cry? I cried watching The Walking Dead because some of my favorite characters were killed off. I won’t say who, but it’s sad.

Feel free to copy these questions and share your own responses.
Thanks for tuning in! 

*****

BTW

It’s mid-month of #Keanuthon and this week’s classic is Speed. One bus. One bomb. One Keanu to save the day!

Co-starring Sandra Bullock, Dennis Hopper, and Jeff Daniels, Keanu plays a cop that has to rescue a group of strangers trapped on a bus that can’t go less than 50 mph. If you already feel like one epic joy ride isn’t enough, rest assured, there’s a Speed 2: Cruise Control – which takes place on a boat. Unfortunately, Keanu isn’t in that one.

We’ll be live tweeting the movie once again on Wednesday, September 16th at 8:00pm CST. Join me and friends or follow along using #Keanuthon.

Get ready for rush hour! 

Also this happened last night. What. Are. The. Odds? 

Jess Witkins Meets Keanu Reeves

Now, even KEANU knows about #Keanuthon. 

Sh*t My Husband Says While Sleeping, Vol. 3

He’s baaaaaack!

Maybe it was the onset of school starting (him being a teacher and all). Maybe it’s the change of the seasons. Whatever the reason, my hubby has started talking in his sleep again.

If you’re new here, this is my husband.

Joe readingHis name is Joe. 
He’s a fan of hot sauce, guitar solos, and
beard oil for facial hair maintenance.

Occasionally, Joe talks in his sleep. Sometimes he calls me his “little pear juice” or starts laughing about crackers and email.

And then there are times, when he’s fast asleep, and he says shit like this: 

Joe: It’s hot.

Me: Are you too hot?

Joe: It’s time to install the hot tub.

Me: Hot tub?

Joe: Where should we put it?

Me: What???

Joe: Don’t you think we need one? To store all this hot water?

Me: …

I don’t… Yah, we’re not getting a hot tub. We’ve never discussed getting a hot tub, and if we ever DO get a hot tub, I am confident that Joe would not install it himself.

Where do YOU keep your hot water? 

*****
P.S. We’re coming up on week 2 of #Keanuthon. Thanks to all who watched Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure with us! We found out it was his birthday on the 2nd, so what a great day to kick off the party!

#Keanuthon

Here is one of my favorite tweets from the event, which came from my movie-clueless friend, Heather. This was a legitimate question she asked before coming over. Oh, Lawd.

This week we’re watching Point Break, the one where Keanu plays an FBI agent who goes undercover to catch a bunch of bank robbers that might be surfers. Costars include Patrick Swayze (with what is possibly the most epic of surfer hair imaginable), Gary Busey as his FBI partner, and John C. McGinley (who you may know as Dr. Perry Cox from Scrubs).

The preview promises 100% pure adrenaline!!

Watch along with us at 8pm CST this wednesday and live tweet the movie using #Keanuthon. Hope to see you there!

Enjoy your week, everyone!

ICYMI: Where I’ve Been Laughing While I Was Away

Hello Cats and Kittens,

How is everyone’s week going?

I’m keeping very busy as usual. Last week I kicked off my debut with a local performance group called Old School Variety Show as a storyteller. I shared two excerpts from my work in progress, Oops Baby. It was quite fun. Here’s a little teaser from my chapter entitled Have No Fear, Dad is Here. 

This past weekend I traveled home to hang out with my sister, but fear not, I was still in the blogosphere. Here are a few of my favorite funny tales ICYMI.

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Alice Whitmore, of Lutheran Liar Looks at Life, dishes all in her date with Steve Martin, The Jerk and The Dude. True story!

Andrea Culletto battles elephant rides and kid debaters (I’m not saying their coach was their dad, but it might have been their dad) in The Elephant in the Room.

Naughty PickleSummer Heacock of Fizzygrrl shares a humorous, gif-filled retelling of her encounters with hyper-religion. This recovering Catholic girl laughed her butt off at this post, but a caution to readers, it’s not for the fundamental of faith. Enjoy Are You There God? It’s Me Fizzy.

Brick House Chick had me screaming with her dietary rant, Cut the Carbs, They Say. We all know it’s not that easy, and this fiery chica was just saying so.

It might sound like a headline out of The Onion, but it’s a true tale over at Jenny Hansen’s blog More Cowbell. Check out her latest post, Hubby’s Jewels Threatened By Doctor With Tuna.

I can only guess that all authors aspire for this kind of acclaim, but The Bloggess is now #4 on Amazon if you search for “giant dildos”. Well That’s…Huh.

The hilarious woman behind Don’t Pet Me, I’m Writing is sharing her response to How Do I Write Humor? (And Other Questions I Suck at Answering).

*****

And don’t forget, #Keanuthon starts tomorrow! Grab a copy of Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure, Dudes, cause we’re starting at 8:00 pm sharp! I can’t wait to live tweet the movie with you! 

#Keanuthon

What’s made you laugh lately? 

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